Relationship Counselling & Couple Therapy
You may feel disconnected from your partner, or there has been a betrayal in the relationship. The conversations that you used to enjoy with your partner are filled with resentment and awkward pauses. You might be wondering if the relationship is worth continuing in the long-term or if you should split up.
Relationship counselling can help you to manage conflicts or issues in the relationship so that you both can form a closer relationship. A relationship may be full of conflicts where the silent treatment is frequent. Conflicts are unavoidable in a relationship but relationship counselling can equip you with the skills of knowing how to fight and recover from conflicts.
Relationship counselling can also address communication problems in a relationship. Negative patterns such as contempt, criticism, stonewalling or defensiveness can destroy your relationship. You learn to identify any negative communication patterns you have and form new communication methods that are based on respect, intimacy and honesty.
You can address small and big issues through relationship counselling in a supportive environment where you explore each other’s wants and needs and build respect, confidence and openness through evidence-based techniques. Your relationship can emerge stronger with professional help.
Couple therapy is an empowering process with empathetic and honest communication as a healthy way to strengthen relationships and ease relationship conflicts.
Through couple therapy, you can recognize the conflicts in your relationship and learn about the relationship dynamics underlying the conflicts. You learn to understand the roles both you and your partner play in the interactions you have with each other, which may change the way you see the relationship and your partner.
You also learn to change the way you interact with your partner and your behaviour so that the wants and needs of both people in the relationship are met. This can involve identifying and changing negative communication patterns so that both people learn to speak to each other in supportive and understanding ways.
Couple therapy also aims to bring out the thoughts and emotions that you may fear expressing to your partner and vice versa to foster a closer relationship. Both people can express themselves emotionally while learning how to solve problems and communicate each other more effectively during conflicts.
Finally, couple therapy can help couples to focus on the strengths of the relationship instead of only concentrating on the problems. This builds resilience for stronger long-term relationships.
I am a registered counsellor with the Singapore Association of Counselling and a Master Solution Focused Practitioner with a Masters in Professional Counselling from Swinburne University (Australia). I was recognised as one of the services with the Best Marriage Counselling in Singapore by Best In Singapore.
For over 10 years I have helped couples build stronger connections with each other when they have struggled with frustration in doing so without professional help.
From my years of experience, I believe that every couple can revive and improve their relationships if they are ready to do the work. I can guide you using strategies that aid clarity, listening and healing to ease the frustrations in your relationship. I provide clarity and guidance on next steps and concrete techniques to handle conflict in a relationship.
Contact me to book an appointment here.
Marriage Therapy / Relationship Counselling
Helping couples heal hurts, regain communication, and re-spark joy in their relationships.
Signs & Symptoms Of Trouble In Your Relationship
Are you struggling to deal with the intense emotions after finding out that your spouse had cheated on you physically, emotionally, or otherwise?
The reality is in most instances, there has not been a third party, but suddenly you feel a disconnect with your partner. And once joyful conversations are now filled with pregnant pauses, resentment, and questions in your head. You feel that no matter what you say,you are no-longer being heard, or that you are not being appreciated as you once were.
Do you find your partner and you constantly arguing over everything;–parenting, the in-laws, work, money, even what to eat for dinner, or whether the toothpaste tube should be rolled up? Have you found that miscommunication plagues every interaction you try to have with your spouse, and well-meaning intentions are met with suspicion or hostility?
Do you feel that you and your partner no longer connect on a deeper level? Or are you trying hard to cope with feelings of utter aloneness? Does it feel like you are living with a housemate instead of a lover?
These are signs that your relationship or communication with your significant other has broken down. Sweeping things under the carpet will not solve anything, at best it only hides the hurt for a little while.
Marriage Therapy / Relationship Counselling
Are you wondering if this vortex of emotions will lead you down the same road as countless other couples who could not resolve their differences and eventually split up? The good news is that the old myth that “half of all marriages end in divorce”, is simply false. The US divorce rate has been falling for decades and current studies estimate it is closer to only ⅓.
However, it does not mean marriage or relationships are getting any easier with time. After all, if we expand the above figure to include unhappy de-facto relationships and add in the ill-contented twosomes who will never divorce, we can see there are large numbers of seriously annoyed, frustrated, unhappy, glum people like you who are desperate for a change.
But what if you could avoid becoming a statistic?
What if you could have the relationship you have always craved?
If any of these sound like your relationship…
- You and your partner do not communicate honestly or with respect.
- There has been a betrayal of trust.
- It feels more like living with a roommate than a lover.
- You feel isolated and alone.
- Your children are holding your relationship together.
- You both genuinely want to improve your relationship.
Then, Couple / Relationship therapy could be for you.
How Does Marriage / Relationship Therapy Work?
Whether aimed at addressing small issues or dealing with potentially relationship-breaking challenges, therapy can help you each feel valued, heard, and connected.
Therapy provides a non-judgmental, supportive environment to explore you and your significant other’s individual wants and needs. Evidence-based techniques and therapies help build confidence, openness. and respect. We will all work together to improve your relationship with each other for the long-haul.
Couple’s therapy is an empowering process for both you and your partner. Growth occurs through encouraging honest, empathetic communication and using strategies and techniques that aid hearing, clarity and healing.
When both partners are provided with the right tools, appropriate approaches, and healthy insights, relationship frustrations often ease or disappear.
Problems become manageable.
Validation & openness increases.
And mature communication paves the way for a calmer, happier relationship and the healthiest way forward together.
When therapy might not help?
- Renowned marriage researcher John M. Gottman claims that the average couple that enters marriage counselling has experienced marital difficulties for over six years, and that the longer a couple waits to seek assistance, the more deeply entrenched the communication problems, thus making them more resistant to improvements.
If your relationship meets any of the following conditions, it will be unrealistic to expect any therapist to resuscitate a relationship you have already pulled the plug on.
- You or your partner have decided that the problems in the relationship are too ingrained and longstanding.
- One or both partners have already decided to end the relationship / marriage and he/she uses the counselling as a way to announce this to their partner.
- Addiction or mental illness is having a major impact on the relationship because it has not been treated prior to attending sessions.
- Verbal or physical abuse is an issue in the marriage and one of the partners is fearful about their safety or well-being so clams up in sessions.
Wonder if counselling for your relationship will really help? The “Journal of Marital and Family Therapy” report that marriage counselling helps seven out of ten couples find great satisfaction in their marriage.
Hello, I am Cassandra, a Master Solution Focused Practitioner, and a registered Counsellor with the Singapore Association of Counselling.
Head to my About page to get to know me as a therapist.
Over the past 10 years, I have been helping couples who want to feel satisfied in their connection with their partner but feel like no matter what they do it just leads to more stress and frustration. I support them in exploring their history and uncovering patterns they may not even be aware of so that they can begin to have more control of their emotions and be excited about their relationship again!
I know from my years of experience working with couples that everyone has the ability to make changes in their lives. If you are ready to do the work, you will be amazed at how capable you are to explore parts of yourself you never knew existed. The process of therapy can allow you to grow more quickly than you ever have before.
Wonderful recognition from Best In Singapore:
The Safe Harbour Counselling Centre x Best In Singapore,
“Best Marriage Counselling in Singapore”
Here is what a couple I helped with had to say:
“I first saw Cassandra with recommendation from my brother-in-law who had seen her previously for his set of problems. Cassandra has been really professional, thoughtful and empathetic in helping me manage my marital issues and my personal mental well-being. My sessions with her always helped me get more clarity and provided me some guidance in what my next steps should be. I encourage anyone with any set of problems to have Cassandra as their go-to person because she is that beacon of light and voice of reason when you are at your darkest and lowest point in your life. Thank you, Cassandra, for making me see hope when I thought all is lost.“
Worried that therapy will be a blame game, or sessions will be indefinite? Fret not, my aim is to get you off counselling with the least number of sessions. This way, you will be confident to recommend me to your friends. Win, win, all round.
Here is what another couple had to say about their experience working with me:
“At first I was skeptical that going to a counsellor would solve the problems in my relationship but because of the hard times we were going through I decided to give it a try. Throughout several joint sessions Cassandra gave us – in a very professional and caring way – a different mindset and view on how our partner feels and reacts and she taught us concrete techniques to deal with conflict. I can easily say that I wouldn’t be in a happy relationship now if it wasn’t for her counselling.”
To check out more testimonials like this, head here.
Concerned that the cost of therapy is too expensive? How often do we save up for a family holiday, only to remain miserable on the trip, or fighting with your partner instead of building beautiful memories? I promise, a couple sessions of counselling are going to cost less than a holiday. For my professional charges, head here.
Check out my FAQ page for more questions about the counselling process.
Or contact me here with any concerns you may have.
When you are ready to put in the work necessary to reverse negative relational patterns in your relationship, I will be honored to guide your relationship towards balance and joy again.
Schedule a counselling session today!